Big Sister

классный.  The word I heard several times today from Liza.  It means "cool", and from her, it comes accompanied by a sweet smile that attempts to subdue some of the underlying excitement she's feeling.  Today, things with her were definitely классный (klassnyy).

Despite the non-stop feeling that we have no control of our lives here while wait this process out, today was a pretty decent day on other fronts.  Determined not to wallow in our inactivity, we started the day with some PT.  Reagan and Gordon went for a run through the busy city streets where only the clinically insane drive.  I returned to my Cold War gym to spend some time on the treadmill and trying not to contract tetanus from the rusted weights.  This is the same gym that requires one to bring a clean pair of sneakers to wear inside and yet offers no soap or paper towels in the bathrooms leaving you wondering at how many staph infections originate there.  But at least my shoes were clean.

We found an interesting outdoor bazaar where all manner of goods are sold (including passports, assorted stinky fish, appliances, name brand knock-offs and amazing Ukrainian food).  After picking up some chicken kabobs and rice with vegetables and beef for about $8 (for 8 people!), we ate in the apartment and I took the girls to the orphanage with Sherrie.  Reagan stayed back with an exhausted Keeper while she nursed a strained hammy from stumbling on one of the innumerable frost heaves along the streets.

The ride over to the orphanage was interesting.  We had the first ever talkative cab driver.  He didn't speak a lick of English but was thrilled to carry on a conversation with me and my limited Russian.  There are some really interesting things we've all noticed about people here in Ukraine from the moment we got off the plane.  1) The percentage of attractive women in Ukraine is ridiculously high.  It's like there's a model convention across the entire country.  (Sherrie pointed this out, not me!).  2)  Probably 80% of adults smoke. 3) Very, very few adults smile.  Ever.  In fact, everyone looks miserable.  I can't imagine why.  4) Everyone greets you on the street with the customary "здравствуйте" which means "hello".  And yet, after said greeting, nobody really wants anything to do with you.  Which is what made our ride with this particular cabbie out-of-the-ordinary.

Arriving for our daily visit at the orphanage, we were greeted by a mass of boys who were eager to play soccer with the three sporty girls (October, Isabel and Mercy).  Liza asked me if I wanted to go play with her also - until she glimpsed my Kindle and then said "movie?".  Sure, why not.  We sat down and started watching "Snow White and the Huntsman".  She has no idea who Snow White is but got into the movie.  A few moments later, some older boys came out onto the field and started pushing our kids off and teasing them, taking the ball and making hissing noises.  Liza said, "Uh-oh", got up, marched across the field, chewed them out for 3 minutes in her rapid Russian.  Mama bear in classic form.  Nobody was going to mess with her sisters!  After a little bit, I got up to play with my girls and some of the boys - just to make my presence known as well.  You know, kids don't make the best choices even when they have solid, stable families.  It's hard to get mad at them when they have no families to instill values or ethics.  Nevertheless, she was mad.  And they listened to her and made space for our kids, not bothering them again.  When you are a day away from 16 in an orphanage, you rule the roost.  The other kids listen to you.

Liza returned to me and I was so proud of her.  I said in the best Russian I could muster, "You are a very good big sister."  She looked at me curiously, "me?"
"Yes, you."
"Oh." She said and walked past as an enormous smile grew across her face.

I couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking at that moment.  Never being the big sister, but now...  I walked over to her and said, "They need you, too."
"Who?"
"Your sisters.  They need you."
More smiles.  It's so hard not to be emotional every step of this journey.  Seeing the mental evolution of someone who has never had family, to step into one.  And into a role that requires a bit of responsibility too, as a big sister.  There is so much joy in becoming family with someone who desperately wants one and to show them how the need for the relationship is not one-sided.

 We returned to our movie but before long, she looked at me and said, "Concert tomorrow.  Me no 'la-la-la'.  Me 'blah-blah-blah'".
I asked, "What time does it begin?"
"Eleven.  Maybe Twelve.  You come?"
"Of course!  We will want to see you!"
She smiled her great big smile and said "Good".

After spending some time watching our movie, Liza paused and looked at me like she had something important to ask.  She walked through the number of days that remain before she can come be with us forever.  She had a few numbers off in terms of days, but I told her what we thought our remaining schedule looked like.  Afterwards, I said "you've been here a long time already."
She answered, "Ten years."
"That's too long." I said.

"Yes."